Understanding Women 111

*Disclaimer: this is the first post (and probably only post) where Gary gets to have his opinion broadcast*

I know for sure that the one trait Gary (the fiance) envies the most is my ability to see all and know all without blinking an eye. I’m not sure if it’s a “woman” thing or if it’s just an inherent ability of being ultra observant.

Gary regularly asks me where this or that is, and 9.5 times out of 10, I know exactly where it is. Now usually when he asks if I’ve seen something, I reply asking if he’s looked for it…properly. “Oh yes! I’ve looked high and low!” is the response I’m often met with. Let me tell you a little secret guys and gals, when a man says he’s “looked” for something, it generally means he’s opened up the cupboard or drawer, stared at the contents willing the item he’s looking for to appear, and when it doesn’t, he closes the drawer or door and thinks that he’s looked adequately. He doesn’t believe that searching actually requires moving things out of the way. I suppose Gary has been spoiled with my GPS-like abilities…

Gary’s response:
Bullshit! The reason why a guy can never find what he’s looking for in a cupboard or drawer is because it was likely arranged by a woman. And therefore there is no system or logic to it at all. When a guy arranges a cupboard, he’ll do it in such a way that it makes sense so that at a glance he can tell if something’s there or not. Any other guy who looks in another man’s “man drawer” would instantly be at home and able to find what he’s looking for. So this whole business about men not being able to look properly is a fallacy.

My response:
Gary packed his own cupboard so he should bloody well be able to find his stuff. And even if he moans that our domestic puts his things away, the clothes are still in the piles he created. So there!

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Man vs Woman

I received this via email the other day about the differences between men and women. I just had to share it with you, you know, just for giggles.

NICKNAMES
· If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.
· If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Dickhead and Shit for Brains.

EATING OUT
· When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it’s only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
· When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY
· A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
· A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need but it’s on sale.

BATHROOMS
· A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel.
· The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS
· A woman has the last word in any argument.
· Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

FUTURE
· A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
· A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS
· A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
· A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE
· A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
· A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, but she does.

DRESSING UP
· A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.
· A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL
· Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
· Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING
· Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
· A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
A married man should forget his mistakes. There’s no point in two people remembering the same things!

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First Impressions

I saw this on Cat’s blog and thought it’d make a nice post here.

What’s the first thing you notice about a man when you meet him?

I am a very aware person so for me there are quite a number of things I notice about someone when we first meet. Probably on the top of my list is grooming. I check his hands to see if he bites his nails. I see if his hair is well groomed. I look at his shoes to see if they’re newly polished. I look to see if he’s clean shaven or if his beard is neatly trimmed. I believe that if a man takes care of himself, he’ll take care of you.

After that I look for a gorgeous smile, an infectious laugh, a sense of humour, unguarded eyes, etc, etc…

As Cat said, if you need some blog fodder – consider yourself tagged!

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Understanding Women 108

Why men will never be able to understand women…

Enjoy!

Hugs & Kisses
Jessica Giggles

*Cartoon credit

Understanding Women 104

How some women choose their partners – “When I wear my #SexyShoes will he still be taller than me?”

Hugs & Kisses
Jessica Giggles